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October 28, 2008
"Ike" & Change
Once again, it is obvious that my blog only gets little perks here and there from me... poor thing. I wanted to be more dedicated, but find myself writing in a monthly newsletter for a local art organization, and somehow this is my excuse for not fulfilling my promise to my blog.
Of course, I do put in an occasional poem and sometimes a new art piece to add some flavor, but overall there has been a lack of contribution on my part, although I do plan to make more of an effort to stay currant.
For instance, I had so much to say about hurricane “Ike”. Gosh, who didn’t... especially for those of us who experienced the wave of super scary weather and the slew of changes that came along with it. Sometimes odd changes... things we just would not have expected. Like, who knew that we would be without electricity for so long, and who knew just how much that would change our perspective about light and the lack of it? Not to mention – air conditioning... ah yes, that thing we take for granite that cools our behinds during those steamy, mosquito-ridden evenings, and during those relentless, smoldering-hot summer days.
But, we were blessed with a slight cool front a few days after the big storm came in, making our experience with darkness a bit easier to get through. After all, most of us had our windows open to let any possible breeze cross our naked, still bodies at night. (Hopefully, you were naked, or at least scantily dressed.)
And let’s not forget the lovely sounds of those hot items known as generators. We had one neighbor who lives a few houses down from us who ran his constantly... even on those cooler evenings! I can only imagine what it was like for the neighbors living right next to him. Yes, the breeze coming through the screened window was wonderful, but that overbearing sound, like someone left their lawnmower running just outside your window... not a pleasant memory that most definitely tainted our possibilities of sleep. One could only close their windows and suffer the stillness, with the slightly muted, but ever-present sound of their neighbor’s blasting generator!
I really don’t want to focus on this kind of thing, because there was something much more interesting going on... like that layer of hidden creamy icing that you might find after biting into your favorite chocolate cake. At first, there were the subtle things, like having no emails to receive or send, or no cell phone to constantly be adjoined to, just in case someone wants to talk with you. There was that weird sense of freedom, even though I admit I had a slight case of withdrawals from these every day forms of communication - I felt a strange kind of relief from their constant presence.
TV was a biggie for me. It is odd, because I am the first to tell anyone that I could do without watching the addicting thing, but when it was just gone like that – well, how funny and yet difficult an adjustment this was! I heard countless stories of families actually having a meal together and talking with each other... imagine! Of course the meal was probably bagged potato chips with hot dogs cooked on a camping burner, followed by more incessant snacking on anything in the pantry or refrigerator (which was losing its’ cool). Forget any restrictions on unhealthy food items or conscience awareness to not overeat. It all went out the door almost immediately, at least in my house!
Another odd thing was what to do when the sun went down. This may sound shallow, but in truth, when sundown is at 6:30 and you are not accustomed to going to bed until 10:30 or 11 p.m., it is surprising just how hard it is to fill your time in the dark. Sure, you can read by a flashlight, hoping that it will have a battery that lasts night after night for who knows how long because you may not have an endless supply of batteries. Or, maybe you can read by candlelight? That didn’t go over too well for my eyes, even with 3 or 4 candles going at once, and then there is the heat these little fires generate.
When it is nearly 80 degrees or more in your dark home with no air moving at all, the last thing you need is the fire of even one of these small candles.... an amazing amount of heat comes from such a little flame!
I would find myself getting sleepy and when I would check the time, it was not even 8 o’clock yet! Now what? I actually went for a couple of late night walks through my neighborhood with my dogs. All their pulling and pushing and clawing to get to the next area to sniff and mark – I am not the best when it comes to discipling my dogs... I so need the Dog Whisperer! But, I felt somewhat safe with them, even though the neighborhood was a bit spooky-dark. I found that other neighbors were doing similar things, although most had the common sense to do this walking around before it got pitch black outside.
Speaking of neighbors, I actually got to know some of mine. It was like a flash from the past – or at least how I envisioned it once was, as we shared our stories and our food. People made a real effort to look into the face of others with a warm smile, almost like we were all saying, “Hey, we sure did share the experience of a crazy storm, didn’t we?”
It was quite nice to get to know some of these people that live all around us, and it felt like we came together naturally – a collective cohesion, the kind that humans generally forget they have the ability to do... a very primal thing. We just get so isolated, even in such a large city, that we start to see each other as a burden instead of another strong link in the community.
This experience has probably left us all with the feeling that nothing ever stays the same. Change is inevitable, and actually a good thing. It’s funny, because I laugh every time I think of one of the lasting results for me.... hanging my laundry outside to dry! I guess this sounds so silly, and kind of like I became my mother, but I love the way they smell - the way they feel and look. There is a softness that the dryer will never give, even if one uses those chemical softeners... just not the same.
Yes, we had a generator too, but we only turned it on in the day to use the washer occasionally and to cool a few food items in our refrigerator – a theory that didn’t really work as food did spoil anyway. This is when I began hanging clothes to dry, and I am so grateful that this change occurred. I know it is not a very profound subject or some deep emotional breakthrough... at least not on the surface. But after some thought I was made aware that living a simpler life might be a good thing after all.
Why do we keep insisting that we need all these modern conveniences? Mostly just habit, and probably an unwillingness to change. I realized how dependent we are on someone else for all our needs... our energy... food, gas, heat, light – everything. No wonder we are so vulnerable and so capable of being in serious trouble, fast. We have outsourced every means to make or build something, leaving us and our next few generations unable to learn any of these simple ways to survive. Forget a “clean living” perspective. We have been such a wasteful people, buying all these throwaway products for their ease of use, with no thought about the outcome on our planet – our own very lives. That is really what is happening here, as we are slowly becoming aware that we have not only affected every other living creature on earth, but ultimately our very own existence. We are hanging on the edge.
This was a wake-up call for me. A small glimpse of how serious it can get if there is no food supply, no clean water and no power. Perhaps many of us got this call, but I think we still just take for granite these provided luxuries and conveniences, and we pay dearly for them, and will continue to pay for not being aware of the effect we are having.
I cannot see change like this happening fast, unless there is a greater tragedy to jump-start the process. I do not want to be a gloom and doom person, but the reality of this is simple when you look at how things have always changed in human history, and how Nature works and has for millenniums.
I have a very strong urge to be more self-sufficient. We could start here and now in the city by growing our own food, recycling, and hey... hanging out our laundry to dry! But there is an even stronger pull for me to move out of the big city and go to higher ground, where I can build a nearly self-sustaining home. This would be ideal, but most of us are not able to do this, and if everybody were able, then the countryside would be like the big city... crowded!
Did someone say change? Yes, I think we were all left with the feeling that things are different now. They always have been, but after such a hurricane, we can see the effect sooner. There are some very positive things that happen, and one that could best sum up the after effects may be the way the human spirit comes out from the shadows to shine in the brightest light. We are so full of amazing abilities, if we just give ourselves the chance. There is no end to the level of capacity to love, and this may be our saving grace.
I remember a movie about an alien from another planet who came to earth disguised (cloned) as a human being. The name of the movie was “Starman”, with Jeff Bridges and Karen Allen. There is a scene near the end when he is asked what he saw in us - what impressed him about us - and after a few words about how primitive and violent we are, he said something close to this ... “ When things are at their very worst, you [human beings] are at your very best. “ I like to believe this.
Posted by kay at 02:51 PM | Comments (0)
October 12, 2008
Thirst
Long hours to walk,
no landmarks, no signs -
a dry heat so penetrating,
clear thinking evaporates,
moist skin becomes leather,
tones of a human voice
drift into the layers
of sand and rock below their feet.
“I will send money, mama...
do not worry” he sees his words.
“We will make it, we will get to the other side.”
He tries to swallow and sees her sitting on the ground.
Her belly seems larger,
her hands look limp,
she leans against a scraggly tree
and he knows she cannot get up again.
Posted by kay at 01:59 AM | Comments (0)